A new look...

I realized today that I have not posted for quite awhile. But it is not surprising given that I am not even writing my manuscripts. I'm barely even writing grocery lists. I don't like it one bit. People I meet ask me what I do for a living and I feel like such a liar by saying I am a romance writer. HA! I would have to write to be called that.

But that complaint is not the reason for this post. I am forced today to do some introspection. To do something I am not fond of doing, and look deep inside myself for some answers to some questions. I don't like doing this because invariably I do not like what I find inside myself and since I hate change, it is quite difficult to drag the crap out of me or to bring it forth like some vomitous mass and look at it as if I am a forensic expert dealing with a scene of a crime. Although I am loath to do, it needs to be done. I certainly cannot expect my friends to do it. It's a wonder they are still my friends, since I have not done it for some time.

I must dig deep and look hard for the inner path I lost long ago. No, I cannot say I lost it. I'm pretty sure I set it aside for something or someone else. To be a wife, a mother, a caretaker, a lover, a go-to person for all things to be managed. I hung myself up in a closet under one of those environmentally unfriendly bags to be taken out at some future date and aired out. The smell of mothballs is probably quite strong.

I think I need to be aired out? Now comes the first step... where to begin?